creating a story Archives - Page 6 of 11

Best advice I’ve ever heard about parenting

Today was one of those mom days. I was tired. And frustrated. And discouraged. And even the sound of a kid talking to me made my ears want to explode. Yes, I typed that out loud.

I just wasn’t up for the whole mom gig today.

Then while sitting in the splash zone of my 2 year olds bath, I found myself reading one of two blogs I follow and I was irritated (which has never happened before with that blog) and even more discouraged. Because she had the perfect pictures and the perfect experiences and the perfect words to describe her life.

And it made me think of how hyper-aware we are, with this Internet/technology connected world, of what all the other parents are doing. And the adventures they take. And the perfect days they have. And the messes they let their kids make. And the cruises they go on. And the games they all play together. And the huge trophy their ridiculously talented child just won. And the schedule they keep. And the meals they prepare. And the dream jobs they have.

But after I tucked my kids into bed, rocked my baby to sleep (and hid in his room for a few minutes), assured my 9 year old her pinkie would indeed not fall off in the night from severe pain, and my 7 year old would not starve before breakfast, I sat for a second and thought how lucky my kids are. And how lucky I am to be their mom.

They are loved. They are told they are loved. They are shown they are loved.

They are fed. They are adored. They have a warm place to sleep, clothes to wear, food to eat. Parents that think about their needs and futures all day long. Extended family that loves them. Books to read. Schools to go to. Great teachers and leaders who love them. Tons and tons of friends. And on and on and on.

And then I thought about the best thing I’ve ever heard (in multiple places) about being a parent. And something I think about nearly every single day. Multiple times.

God was intentional about where he placed his children and who their parents would be. And He gave me MY kids. For. A. Reason.

So when a neighbor, relative, friend, teacher, parent, stranger tells me my 3 year old shouldn’t have a binkie, I should let my kids “cry it out” to teach themselves to sleep, my kids have anxiety because I don’t leave them enough, I spend too much time exercising, I shouldn’t let her eat ice cream, I’m too patient, I should never let a child sleep in my bed, I can’t believe you let them…., you should be engaged with your child every.single.minute, you shouldn’t feed them that kind of food, you hold your babies too much, I think to myself:

“That’s why they’re mine and not yours.”

And occasionally I actually say it out loud to people who think they need to correct my parenting.

Because it’s true.

My kids are mine. And they need what I have to give. The real me. Not the imitation me. Not the me trying to be like other moms. But the me who can give them what I can give them. And do what I can do. And love them the way no other mom can. Because I am their mom.

So momma’s everywhere. May we all try a little harder to encourage one another more instead of discourage. And build each other up instead of tear each other down. And recognize we can give our kids something no other mom can. And may we all try a little harder to step up and be the kind of mom WE want to be and know we can be. Not the kind of mom others tell us to be.

And may we always remember we all love our kids. And we’re all doing the best we can with what we have. And doing what we think is best for OUR children. And what I do may not work for you. And what you do may not work for me. And THAT’S OKAY!!!

Instead of comparing and despairing (I totally just made that up), let us celebrate each other’s success’s. And remember to celebrate our OWN.

You. You, momma, are doing a good job. (I’m shouting that at you) Just keep showing up. Your kids are yours for a reason. Please don’t ever, ever forget that.

And as my friend, Glennon, would say “Carry on, warrior” momma’s, carry on.

Picture Display Movement. Step 4. PRINT

{Click the links for Step 1, Step 2, or Step 3 if you missed any of the previous posts}

Ah. The step that seems to give me the most trouble. Well, at least it used to. Cause things are changing around here. And I already have a good start.

I take loads of pictures. I get them on my computer. And now I have them all organized. But what a bummer if it ends there. What’s the point of taking them if no one ever gets to see them? All those memories, emotions, and STORIES of our lives sit on a hard drive and remain untold. And add to my mom-guilt that is already never ending.

So one of my bigger priorities this year is to print and display the pictures I take of our family. In albums, and other forms of display.

When deciding what to print, I start with the END in mind. I do this before I even take some of the pictures I take. What is the point of taking this picture? What story am I trying to tell? And how am I going to share it? Will it be on the wall? The magnet board? In a slideshow? Or a photo album?

Let’s start with just basic prints for a photo album. I have recently discovered a new way for displaying my photos. It’s called Project Life. And I’m kind of obsessed because it is exactly what I’ve been looking for. (You can visit the website here)

But let’s talk printing for just any photo album OR a photo book you can create online through Blurb or Shutterfly or similar companies.

Here’s a quick and easy way (because those are my most important criteria in pretty much everything these days) to pick the pictures you want to print.

Since I’m still playing “catch up”, here’s how I’m doing it right now.

In iPhoto, I clicked on the folder for 2013 ( I’m starting with the most recent and working my way backwards.) All the pictures from 2013 show up in my screen. I started at the top and scrolled through the pictures. I click on the pictures I want to print and “flag” them.

See how some of those pictures have a little orange flag in the top left corner. To “flag” a picture, you select it (you can select multiple pictures by clicking on one, then clicking on another while holding the “command” key) and then click “flag” at the bottom left of the screen.

Once I scrolled through the whole year, I clicked on the “Flagged” tab on the left of the screen so I can see all the pictures I have flagged.

It also tells you how many photos you have flagged. So for 2013 I have 1103 pictures I want to print.

The next step is to select all those pictures that I flagged and put them in a folder on my desktop. Click on the first picture, hold down Shift and click on the last picture to select them all. Then drag and drop them into a folder. My folder is labeled “TO PRINT“.

Once I have them in the folder, I do a quick edit on those pictures. And by quick edit, I mean quick. I don’t spend hours editing photos. Because if I do, they’ll never get printed. I know this about me. It has to be simple. It has to be quick. It’s just the way I work.

Once edited, I upload them for printing. I’ll have to do this in batches so it doesn’t feel as expensive.

My plan is to stay current with the year I’m on, and add in photos from previous years until I have them all printed. But I have to stay current with this year so I don’t just keep falling further and further behind.

So at the end of January, I will print January’s pictures using this process. I will also print a bundle of the photos from last year. Previous years pictures will go into a Project Life album in no particular order. I just want them where we can see them. Just gettin’ it done.

But the current year will go into albums according to month.

I will have a date set to print pictures each month and a date set to put those pictures in the Project Life albums. Scheduling a consistent and regular time to organize and print photos is more important to me than just about anything else I can schedule.

Step 4. Print those pictures!!!

{To see my suggestions on where to Print pictures, both for an album and for display in other ways in the home, go to this post.}

{To learn more about Project Life, check out my post here for the physical products, or here to learn how to use the Project Life APP, or go to the Project Life website here}

On to Step 5. Displaying your photos.

{To stay connected, receive periodic newsletters, and exclusive tips and tricks you can subscribe to the blog in the right margin. Your e-mail is safe with me. Promise}

Create a better story for your family. And photograph it.

I’ve been working crazy hard on the content of the “Tell My Story” intensive two part course. I believe in the message. And I believe in the importance of the message.

The first time I taught a photography class, it was because someone asked me to. Now that I have found the real message of the class, I teach because I feel compelled to share something that directly impacts the course of my family story.

The next “Tell My Story” photography class will be on THURSDAY, MAY 15th. It will begin at 9:45 am and will be over around 2:15 pm (depending on the amount of questions).

The course has TWO parts. The first portion of the course will be completed online where you can work at your own pace before the live portion of the class on May 15th. The theory behind this goes along with the Khan Academy where we’re essentially flipping the traditional classroom model and you will do your “lecture” at home, and then come to class to do the “homework”. (You can see Khan’s TED talk here)

The online portion of the course will cover all things related to “better” photos. Both technical and emotional. We will also talk about CREATING a story for your family. Ways to be an intentional parent. And then how to photograph that story so it is documented and continues to fuel our memory and hearts.

After completing the online portion of the class, we will meet together and use that foundation of knowledge in an interactive, hands on class where you will learn how to be in control of your camera, get consistently “better” photos, and intentionally create and document your family story.

You can read more about what you’ll learn at the “Tell My Story” course HERE.

And as always, e-mail me with any questions! [email protected]

You deserve this! And so does your family.

“Photography fuels memory….

and memory fuels the heart and soul”

Mitchell’s Journey

Project Life

“Cultivate a good life and document it”

That’s the slogan of Project Life. And I can’t believe it has taken me this long to find out about it.

I am NOT a scrapbooker. The thought of designing and even worse, creating a scrapbook page makes me want to cut my fingers off. It does not appeal to me.

Sure, I love the end product. But even then, I always had an “issue” with scrapbooking because it felt like it was more about the “stuff” than it was about the pictures. And I want my displays to be about the pictures. About the people. About the story.

So I’ve tried several different ways of displaying photos. And, unfortunately, I’ve just left a lot of my photos on my computer where no one gets to see them but me.

Until I found Project Life. It’s exactly what I’ve been looking for. Simple. Affordable. And something I can keep current with. And it supports my intent to display photos that will enrich our family’s life. Project life is about the STORY, not about the STUFF.

I listened to a 3 day conference Becky Higgins (the creator of Project life) did online and decided we should probably be friends. Because our mission is the same. Document your life. Tell a story. CREATE a story/life (cultivate a good life). And in the process of doing that, you become more grateful, more aware, and more intentional.

“The truth is, if what we choose to do with our lives won’t make a story meaningful, it won’t make a life meaningful either.” Donald Miller

Cultivate a good life, and then tell the story by documenting it.

Project Life goes hand-in-hand with the Tell My Story class.

Here’s how it works. You buy a Core Kit, an Album, and Sheet protectors (I use 40% off coupons and get them at Hobby Lobby or Michaels). Select and print your photos. Then it’s simple. You just slide pictures and journaling cards in pockets. And in no time, you have a completed album. (You can watch video demonstrations on the Project Life website)

There are a few reasons I prefer Project Life over an album you design digitally online.

First, I sit in front of a computer far longer than I’d like to for my business. Any more hours in front of the computer and my eyeballs might fall out.

Second, I like to be able to do it while I’m doing something else (like catching up on all my DVR shows, or sitting by kids while they do homework).

Third, it’s FAST. And super simple. Both of which are requirements in pretty much anything I do these days.

Fourth, they look AWESOME when they’re done. More visually interesting than a traditional photo album with pictures in pockets.

Fifth, my kids can get involved and help. They become invested in the project.

Sixth, you can also journal in the albums. There are “journaling cards” where you can write small amounts of information to supplement (note I said supplement as the pictures are the main focus of the album for me) the pictures.

Seven, you can make some killer unique gifts with Project Life. I’ll post some things I’ve done with them so far in a separate post.

But the biggest reason I appreciate Project Life is that I’m able to look through my albums and see what we’ve accomplished and what efforts we’ve made at living a good life story, but it also helps me see what we’re missing so we can be more intentional about our future and live the life we want to live.

The boxes also make a great spot for folding paper cranes. Folded 30ish of those (out of 1000) for a friend fighting stage 4 Lymphoma.

Try it out. I’m pretty sure you’ll fall in love like I have.
And your kids will love you!

And for those of you who aren’t really the scrapbooking type (which I’m totally not) check out the Project Life App. It’s a game changer!!

Click here to visit the Project Life website.

And for another idea on displaying photos in your home, click here for a super awesome wall display.

Real Life Stories–Women of Inspiration. My friend. She has cancer.

I’m starting a series on my blog. “Real Life Stories–Women of Inspiration”. I’m inspired by strong women who show up every day and share their stories with the world. I’ll be interviewing women from all different life situations that I want to learn more about who inspire me to show up and live a better life story. And then I’ll share their stories with all of you (and my kids).

The first person I wanted to feature is my friend.

You know those e-mails you never want to get? Those ones that tell you one of your childhood friends has cancer. Yea, I got one of those. And though it was obviously devastating news, it’s turning out to be a defining period of my life.

Lisa, who I also affectionately call Nickell (her maiden name), and I met when I was 12. We played competition soccer together. So we’re not just friends, we’re teammates. We played soccer together for nearly 10 years.

She’s had more than her fair share of health problems. And then got hit with Stage 4 non-hodgkins lymphoma. A game changer to say the least.

No one wants to hear the word cancer associated with themselves or someone they love. But along with the hell associated with cancer, there is also an element of hope. A look into the human spirit at its finest, bravest moments.

She decided to shave her head before chemo started taking her hair. She wanted to be in control of whatever she could. So I asked her if I could photograph the “hair funeral”. Watching her shave her head was one of the bravest things I have ever witnessed. Those pictures are still too painful and intimate for her to share, but here are a few after she was done.

Here is the interview I did with her. And stick around until the end cause we’re doing something really cool for her (that can also be used as a template for other people to use for those they love with cancer) and I NEED your help!!!

1. Give me a quick peek at your story: I was born and raised in Utah. I played soccer since before I can remember. I played in high school for Alta. I’ma lover of all sports and outdoor activities. What I lack in size, I made up for in my determination. I’m very competitive. I went to nursing school and met my amazing husband at the University of Utah. I’ve been married for 11 years. On September 5th our life changed when I was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. I’ve been battling for my life ever since.

2. Tell me an “every day moment” you are grateful for: Right now, I am grateful for waking up alive each day. Getting to tell my family that I love them, and giving my niece a hug.

3. What is one ambition you have right now: I want to start a health clinic on wheels for the homeless. Similar to the 4th Street Clinic, but mobile.

4. If you could speak on anything to a large group of women, what would you talk about? That one single person can make a difference. You, alone, can make a change in the world. You don’t need thousands of dollars and thousands of people to help make a difference. What you, alone choose to do each and every day can change someone’s world.

5. What does the phrase “create a good life story” mean to you? To me, it means living every single day to its fullest. Live each day like it could be your last.

6. Tell me something someone taught you that made an impact on your life Right before my grandma died, she told me to never hesitate to tell someone that you love and appreciate them. Don’t assume that they already know. It’s okay if you told them yesterday…say it again. If you’re feeling it in the moment, say it.

7. Name one event in your life that has made the greatest impact on the course of your life story Becoming a wish granter for the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Also, going to Haiti.

8. What is something you want to accomplish you haven’t yet? I want to have children

9. What photographs are you most grateful for from your childhood or teen years? I’m most grateful for photos of my family and close friends. I’m relying a lot upon those people right now, and it’s comforting to look back at older photos and see that it’s the same group of people that have continually supported me through whatever life throws my way.

10. What are you most proud of? Never quitting. Never giving up.

11. Tell me something you are sure of: I’m sure there is a level of happiness that comes from serving someone else that can’t be reached any other way.

12. What is your favorite quote or your life motto? I have two: “Life’s most persistent and urgent questions is, ‘What are you doing for others?'” Martin Luther King Jr., and “You must be the change you wish to see in the world” Gandhi

13. What is your favorite part about yourself (not a physical trait)? I really care for those less fortunate than me, and try to do whatever I can to help them.

14. What type of photographs do you wish you had more of? I wish I had more photographs from my honeymoon and dating my husband.

15. What is something you do to help drive away fear or anxiety? I used to exercise to drive away fear and anxiety. Now, I hand out hamburgers to the homeless.

And for fun:

Favorite Book: Oh, the Places You’ll Go! by Dr. Seuss

Favorite Family tradition: Dutch Oven Cook off at the cabin

Something you enjoy doing with your spouse: playing tennis

Talent you wish you had: I wish I could play a musical instrument

Favorite meal: It changes weekly. Right now I would say it’s cantaloupe. Yep, just cantaloupe

If you never had to do one specific things again, what would it be: Go through a round of chemo. Or, on a lighter note, fill the car with gas

Favorite show on TV: Vampire Diaries

Something that scares you: Dying without having told my family I love them first

Favorite thing about your husband: Brian can always make me laugh. It doesn’t matter what trial we’re facing he helps me face it with humor. And he is just so kind. Brian is the kindest man I know.

Type of candy you can’t life without: ALL CANDY. Anything you would find in the candy isle. I need it all

What’s something you think about often: I think a lot about hunger in the world. People going hungry.

If you don’t know Lisa, you’re missing out. For those of us who get to call her a friend, well, we’re pretty lucky. She’s definitely one-of-a-kind. She’s nearly killed me (literally) on several different adventures we’ve been on together. Once in a very sketchy mini-van ride, another where I nearly drowned. I blame her for my fear of water.

Here’s where I need your help. For any of you who know and/or love someone with cancer, you know how brutal it is. Not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. The days are long. The weeks even longer. Because her cancer is so severe, she has to be admitted to the hospital each time she receives chemo. She stays there for at least 6 or 7 days, often more, at a time.

It gets lonely. And hard. And scary. And there are days where all she can do is draw on the strength of others. Her walls in the hospital are lined with pictures of people who love her. To remind her why she’s fighting.

Right now, she needs something more than ever to take her mind off what is still ahead. She still has a long way to go–more chemo, then a bone marrow transplant.

Lisa is famous for her “peace sign” in pictures. Always flashing that peace sign.

So. We (she’s in on this) want to collect as MANY pictures of people flashing the peace sign as we can and put them in a huge collage (I’m talkin’ huge) for her to hang on the wall in the hospital and in her home. Even if you don’t know her, we’d love for you to participate. My guess is we ALL know someone affected by cancer (it’s so rampant) so we know how desperate people get for hope. And when Lisa sees pictures of people doing the peace sign with HER in mind, it brings her hope. And peace to her soul.

There is strength in numbers. And strength in knowing people are thinking about you and people CARE.

We’ll be collecting pictures for ONE WEEK. Deadline is next Thursday, March 27th. Doesn’t need to be anything fancy. Just a picture of you, your kids, co-workers, family, strangers, whatever doing the peace sign. Then e-mail it to me. [email protected] Please title the e-mail “PEACE PICTURE” so we don’t lose any. That’s it. (You can e-mail it directly from your camera phone. If you don’t know how to do that, ask a kid. They’ll know how:) )

You can also send more than one picture with different groups of people. We’ll take as many as we can get.

Once we have them, we’ll make a killer poster. And post it so everyone can see. And hopefully make it into a useable template for anyone else who wants to use it to do a similar project for someone they love with cancer.

Thanks in advance for your help. My friend needs a boost. A push to keep fighting. She’s a fighter. But no one can fight cancer alone.

Love you Nickell.

We now declare the following week “Peace Sign Picture” week. I gave myself power to do that.

To read more “Real Life Stories–Women of Inspiration” interviews, CLICK HERE.